Divorce is a life-altering event that often involves complex emotional and legal challenges. For children caught in the midst of a separation, the absence of a parent can be particularly impactful. As a Fort Collins Divorce Lawyer, I’ve witnessed firsthand the importance of facilitating a healthy reconnection between absent parents and their children. In this article, we’ll explore the considerations and steps involved in supporting children through this delicate process.

Understanding the Emotional Impact of An Absent Parent:

Children are deeply affected by the separation of their parents. While emotions vary based on age and personality, feelings of confusion, anger, sadness, and even guilt are common. When an inactive parent seeks to reconnect, it’s vital to approach the situation with sensitivity and empathy.

**1. Legal Considerations and Custody Arrangements:

From a legal standpoint, custody arrangements are a crucial starting point. For the purpose of this post, we will assume that the absent parents do not have custody and that the present parent has full physical custody. When an absent parent wishes to reconnect, it’s essential to consult legal counsel to ensure that any changes align with existing custody agreements and the best interests of the child. Depending on the nature of the relationship, and the life of the parent, supervised visitations only may be recommended.

**2. Child’s Best Interest:

Family courts prioritize the best interests of the child when making custody decisions. Before initiating reconnection, consider how this interaction will impact the child’s well-being. Is the inactive parent genuinely committed to their child’s welfare, or is there a potential risk of emotional distress? How does the child view their absent parent?

**3. Open Communication:

Effective communication is key. All parties involved should openly discuss the reconnection plan. The child’s feelings, reservations, and desires should be taken into account. Encourage a safe space for the child to express their emotions and concerns.

**4. Gradual Reintroduction:

Abruptly reintroducing an absent parent may overwhelm a child. Instead, ease into the process. Begin with supervised visits in neutral settings, gradually progressing to longer and less supervised interactions. This allows the child to become comfortable with the parent’s presence.

**5. Professional Guidance:

In some cases, seeking professional assistance may be beneficial. Family therapists or child psychologists can help children navigate their emotions and parents establish healthy communication channels.

**6. Consistency is Key:

Consistency fosters stability for children. If such a parent wishes to reconnect, they should commit to maintaining a consistent presence in the child’s life. Sporadic appearances can lead to confusion and emotional distress.

**7. Focus on the Positive:

Encourage the parent to focus on building positive memories during interactions. Engaging in shared activities or hobbies can create enjoyable experiences that strengthen the parent-child bond.

**8. Respect Boundaries:

Recognize that rebuilding trust and connection takes time. Respecting the child’s boundaries and comfort level is crucial. Avoid pressuring the child into interactions or situations that might cause discomfort.

**9. Ongoing Evaluation:

Reconnecting with such a parent is an ongoing process. Regularly evaluate the child’s emotional well-being and their response to the reconnection efforts. Adjustments may be needed based on the child’s evolving needs and feelings.


Did an absent parent come back into the life of your child or children? When parental situations change, it can bring up a lot of complex emotions, as well as the opportunity to revisit custodial arrangement, parenting plans, and more! Alexander & Associates, expert Fort Collins Co Divorce Attorneys, can help with any modifications to a parenting plan or custody arrangement, and help you determine what kind of custody arrangements will be best for your family. Contact Alexander & Associates today for assistance, advice, and more!